Authenticity & Attachment: Are We Suppressing Ourselves Unconsciously?

So many of us have literally drifted far and away from our true Authenticity of who we truly are. I believe, as many of us have come to learn more than ever right now, that we were brought into this lifetime for a reason and a Damn Good One!

We are all uniquely Created, over 8 Billion of Us, all Connected whether we like it or not. As children we were taught to hide parts of ourself to fit in and avoid our true self to not feel shame. Learning to care too much of what others think? Are we a lost culture?  

Come on this journey of exploration with me today, learning something new...

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Transcript

1:02

Hello and welcome. Today is the last day of March, 2025. We'll be welcoming in April tomorrow. So by March 31 days have been completed already, and I have started several different blogs. Today I decided to do this one, which is called Authenticity versus Attachment. So today's podcast is somewhat about authenticity, although this is a very, very broad topic and it's very well discussed over many different podcasters and articles and therapists, and it's just there's a huge movement happening and it's very exciting. So authenticity versus attachment are we suppressing ourselves unconsciously. So what does this mean exactly? Suppressing ourselves unconsciously. So many of us literally have been drifting far and away from our true authenticity of who we truly are. I believe as many of us have come to learn more than ever right now, that we are brought into this lifetime for a reason and a damn good one. So if you haven't, this is food for thought. And if you have not yet stopped to think about this, the big picture, what are we doing here, right? It's very complex and I know it can be a lot. I believe that we are all here for a reason. We all have a purpose. I saw something on Instagram today. I'm not a huge social media guru. The word guru just came to my psyche. But I do dabble. And with Instagram specifically, how I use that platform is usually I will scroll through. And most of what I'm seeing these days, which is like in the last year or two, my algorithm seems to have changed to just certain things, certain groups, not necessarily, or artists. The people that are in my Insta family, like people I know, friends and family, I don't even see anything that they post honestly. I go on my Instagram for a couple of reasons. I post something on there, which again, my algorithm has changed so much that really hardly any of my followers are seeing it. But I will see quotes and Viola Davis is one of the people that I follow and I will see things that she posts. And she had this amazing post today that I put on my story, and it was just about how in this generation that we're in right now, in this time, let's say in this time that we are in, okay, not necessarily one generation I'm talking about, but I'm a Gen X. So Gen Xers we're definitely feeling this. And I think even generations coming maybe 20 years prior to being a Gen X are also feeling this in some way. But I know Gen Xers are really feeling this. Those of you in your forties and fifties, we are still working hard. We're still working our asses off, and we are trying to figure out our purpose and we're feeling the movement that is happening underneath our feet and what we are here to do and trying to figure out why, what is going on and why does all this drama and political destruction and just wars and climate crisis, just so many disastrous things all around us are crumbling and it's very, very sad. And so there must be more, right? There must be a bigger, higher purpose of why we're here. And so going back to this feel of Davis Post today, it was kind of like cartoonish, but it was like, here we are in this time, and why are we chosen to be here during this time with all of these things and how hard it can be on top of it. It's like we're being called to do something greater. We're being called to heal the generational trauma from our past. Because a lot of what's happening now, like I've said before on our podcast, that it's nothing new. There's some things that are new, of course, right? We've evolved and there's technological pollution and environmental pollution that we've never seen before. But other than that, wars have gone on and evil, darkness fighting and all kinds of bad stuff has happened for variance, right? And so it's not like we just all of a sudden became a horrible society. We being called to heal, to heal ourselves, to finally look at ourselves, to figure out what's going on in our bodies and ourselves and our minds with our emotions and to grow and to become better. And yes, a lot of this was passed down. There's generational trauma that we're born here with that is in ourselves as part of our DNA when we come into this world. And so just from the beginning of when we were born, we have stuff that we're carrying into the world with that we either deal with or we don't deal with. And how we deal with it is profound. We are all uniquely created as well. Over 8 billion of us, we are all unique. And of course there will be similarities as we are from the same source of life all connected, whether we like it or not. As children, we were taught to hide parts of ourself to fit in and to avoid our true self, to not feel shame, learning to care too much of what others thought about learning to care too much of what others thought about who we should or shouldn't be. Led many into a lack of being into someone unknown almost. Are we a lost culture? Well say no. To where we authentically want to say yes and yes to the things that we authentically would rather like to be saying no to will only cause distress, especially over time it becomes chronic distress. And this is basically and literally core values. What is your gut or core speaking to you on a daily? How do you express this? Some expressions can come out as irrational without knowing how to sustainably address these feelings of the authentic suppression. Are we just being shameful or afraid? This is obviously being passed down and has become a universal behavior to some extent. Affecting the collective consciousness on a whole expression is vital to wellbeing on this journey. By overcoming these fears and our shameful feelings, we then and I believe only then can flourish into what is beyond what we have known. This is a crucial time for spreading out our wings so we can be the strongest version of self while we exist here in this realm we call life, it feels like expression is evolving like never before. This is very exciting, and for me to hold on for the ride, I feel the need to expand even more, create more, connect more and love more without the need of validation are my keys to freedom according to Gabor Mate and other therapists. Now we operate in terms of interpreting and processing apparatuses, and I want to see therapists that not just come after him, but those that taught him and that came before him as well. We have these interpreting and processing apparatuses, so we technically were built with internal equipment to naturally interpret, process, analyze, and respond to the information that we're given. This information is coded into our brains cells and more within us for a lifetime. Unfortunately, some of this information may not be of a healthy nature, thus creating unhealthy responses of toxic emotions. This is critical to understand even more critical to first become aware in order to recognize these emotions where they stem from and nurture that part of self again and again to break the code. And maybe this goes back to breaking the code of our generational trauma, not just the code that was encoded in us during childhood, but before that even, what triggers set off stress responses in the body? According to Dr Mate, primary triggers are uncertainty, conflict and loss of control. Being uncertain about anything is very frustrating. And I personally know this one very well as if I feel I may have lost my true self in childhood, making my intuition weak without a sense of intuition. We get indecisive and uncertain about our choices. What I'm learning is to meditate more quiet the mind in order to hear, feel at peace, and see signs better. Whether they're numbers or just a voice in your head that says something, it's called a ping. If you do, there's a kind of work called TBM or to be magnetic. They do a lot of different workshops and they have these deep imaginings. I've talked about them before in the podcast. I know I've gotten really into this work. And there's different kinds of signs that you'll see and then you know that you're doing the right thing. It's like almost like a confirmation. It's confirming that you're on your path and then acting on those signs, those pings, we call it in TDM. What about conflicts? How to handle them sustainably? This is tough for sure. What have we learned or not yet learned in healthy communication? NVC or nonviolent communication has been an excellent tool for many, including myself, but only when remembered by the body to use it, to use it appropriately, to use it in times of need. And remembering is practicing like all things I suppose. So practicing is remembering and remembering is practicing. It can go both ways. So yeah, just starting to practice. Practice any good tool that is handed down and then remembering will just be natural as we practice more and more. I strongly believe in managing stress levels to naturally feel calmer though on a daily. So then if a trigger arises, the reaction can be managed from a stable place, not a knee jerk blowout and not having to even remember to go to another tool. So for me, being an herbalist and knowing about different plants, let's say, that are here on this earth, that can help the nervous system and to help you feel a certain way, can really be a great daily practice. Even it's like food. Herbs are food. And so it goes along with the nutrition and what you're giving your body. Your body's going to react either by giving you good feelings and health and vibrancy, or it's going to react by not feeling so good. And that includes your mental and emotional state by what we put in our bodies. So herbs are food and there are herbs that can help our nervous system to feel well and regulated. So then if these triggers are going to be there, they're in there. Even Dr. Mate was talking about when, this wasn't even that long ago. I think he's in his eighties and it was like in the last couple of years, he got triggered still by his wife and they had to still work through something. And I think they finally got through it, he said, but this was just a few years back, maybe like two or five years ago, I can't remember exactly, but it wasn't that long ago and they'd been married for 50 years, 50 plus years. But it was something that he recognized was something from his childhood. It's always going to be there. And it's how we react and how we learn to react over time by regulating our nervous systems. And there's so many ways to do that. So our bodies need proper tools to operate sustainably to our outer world. They just do. Loss of control is when we freak out, when feeling out of control, if not having control over everything that matters, right? So what we think matters, and some things don't even really matter, but we think they do. So this can stem from unhealthy attachments out of a wounded child. And what really matters though, really ask yourself that maybe we can never really completely be in control. Surrendering to the process creates a ton of freedom. Asking AKA praying may bring answers quicker than we think. Trust capital RUST. I say this and I have to practice it every day because it's easy to get caught up. It really is. It's all about balance. Our partner is also magnifying what we are marrying. So if we're marrying something, if we're emanating something, our partner that we're with our life partner or those that are closest to us, we'll begin to magnify that. And this is true actually for children as well because I had four kids and I learned this early on, raising kids. I was told by my elders or just hearing this over and over from different people, that kids are our greatest teachers. You probably heard that. So when it's your own child and they're the closest person to you, you're spending a shit fuck ton of time with them. They're going to be magnifying what you are mirroring what you are emanating out and giving to them. They will only magnify it. So think of your life partner in the same way. So the partner that we're choosing may be the most important decision that we can make in our life because of that factor. We don't want, if we're not mirroring, loving joy, happiness, peace, peace, kindness. If we're not mirroring that in those things, if we're mirroring the opposite, then we're going to have drama that's going to be magnified with a partner. We're also attracting similar partners to us. So if we're marrying all those good things, joy, love, peace, happiness, kindness, then our partner's going to feel that. Then they're going to do that too, right? They're going to magnify that energy. So are they supporting you? The true you? Maybe why so many marriages fail in the end? Did marriage start out authentically by both sides or the opposite, vice versa? I must sound bold by this point if you are still listening, but that's what writing really is. And speaking, creating your thoughts from learned knowledge, imagination, and then sharing such with whomever wants to listen. Breathing into my true authenticity is the pledge that I'm making to myself from now on. It's a challenge. And do you want to join? I think that the place I've come to entering my fifties is literally challenging this shit because I know it's real. I know it feels deep in my heart. My intuition, although I'm working on strengthening it, there's some things I just know for sure. And in human design, I am a two four, which is very much has to be in tuned with their intuition order for their life to work in their favor. And so I've devoted my next years until whenever I'm not here anymore, to getting to know myself even more and learning how to act on things and react from my intuition so that I'm making the best choices. I know I've made a bunch of choices that were not aligned with my intuition as much as they should have been, and that's why I find myself being very indecisive. I think a lot of us, we can't make decisions. We're not connected, right? We're not using our intuition, our gut, which I've also been talking about on the last couple podcasts, if you, not last weeks, but the couple weeks before that I get into the intuition and talking about our connection with the planet and microbes and whatnot. So if you want to know more about that, there's a couple interesting tidbits maybe there for you. So the final note that I want to leave today with is that anger releases toxic chemicals like cortisol, adrenaline, and others. Keeping that brief, but with chronic exposure to these chemicals can lead to cardiovascular disease, immune suppression, digestive issues, and mental health disorders like anxiety and depression all around. Anger is one of the most toxic emotions. It's a natural emotion that we all have. We don't want to suppress it. We want to be able to release it in a healthy way, not on others, but with a therapist with a good, healthy outlet and kindness to others. On the other hand, is also an act of self-love as this is a feeling that releases bliss. Chemicals like oxytocin, endorphins like serotonin and dopamine. These create a feeling of happiness, love, and joy. In turn, these positive feelings will permeate into the quantum field, bringing back more like a boomerang. Look up the boomerang effect. I learned a little about this recently and yeah, it's pretty amazing, and I know that that is real and that's why I'm on this path, and I want to spread more of this information out there as well. This act is a gift to all creating more loving vibrations. I heard the other day that just 10 transformed minds can literally shift the entire collective consciousness on a whole, transformed by the thoughts, emotions, feelings that we are vibrating out into the universe. You get me? So I think this was Carol Miss that I heard this from, and she knows a shit ton. She's very connected. So if just 10 beings on this planet, out of over 8 billion of us, just 10 shift, okay? We're talking people that aren't in the right mind state, that are having negative thoughts and emotions and feelings, but it's just 10 of us that are feeling that way can shift and be transformed. That will literally emanate out, permeate out into the galactic universe, into all the fields that we cannot see, but that are there into that energy and create a better world. It's going to be felt on a collective vibration and the world will start shifting and changing. So on that note, I thank you for listening and a lot of us right now are really feeling it. We're just coming out of this Aries eclipse time. We're also in the middle of another mercury retrograde, and I am not an astrology expert, but those two things alone, Aries being fire in the eclipse and hasn't happened in a long time. It's a very intense time. Let's just say that. Okay? Mercury and retrograde is always more intense with communication and can be really dark for some of us. But what we really need is to just be going within ourselves and listening and trying to connect with that intuition so we can stay strong and we can get through this and become brighter and lighter and more abundant on the other side of it. So let's keep connecting. There's just so much goodness out there. I'm really enjoying writing and speaking, and I'm going to keep doing it because I don't really care how many people are listening. But I like doing this because it's a creative outlet and I love you if you are here with me, and please do give me a review and comment, whatever. I'd love to connect with you.